IGBOZURUOKE FORUM

By Johnson Babajide,

There is this popular saying that there are three major events  in one’s life; birth, marriage and burial. Out of the three events, wedding ceremony is regarded as the only one planned  by the celebrant.

Little wonder many people  go the extra miles to celebrate marriage ceremony (since the other two events are planned and celebrated without one’s input). But in African setting , particularly, some societies in Nigeria, wedding and burial ceremonies  are celebrated with pump and pageantry.

In recent times, it is becoming more expensive in some societies in Nigeria to die than to live. In Tivland, marriage and burial ceremonies are becoming events extremely out of the reach of common man.

Within the space of six months, two prominent personalties in Tivland have raised the alarm over the huge sum of money Tiv people invest in wedding and burial ceremonies.

Wife of the governor of the state, Mrs Eunice Ortom had, early this year, called on the paramount ruler of Tiv nation, Tor Tiv, His Royal Majesty, Professor James Ayatse, to see to how  the  bride price in Tiv nation could have downward review.

Mrs Ortom, who paid courtesy call on the paramount ruler in February this year, said that the high pride had rendered many elegible young ones in Tiv nation unmarried especially in the face of the country’s economic meltdown.

However, the paramount ruler who re echoed this few weeks ago, decried the high bride price and extravagant spending at burial ceremonies among his subjects and called on them to review these as the cost of living is becoming extremely difficult.

The Nigerian Tribune reliably gathered that bride price in Tivland is not actually fixed but varies according to clans and households. ‘What is expensive is the programme line-up for the events which in most cases do cost some people a fortune’, Chief Ternemger Kajo said.

Ternenger also submitted that payment of bride price by a man does not end until the wife stops giving birth, it is said that a man is required  to  ‘renew’ the bride price anytime his wife gives birth.

For Isaac Tyondu, ‘bride price in Tiv land varies from family to family, in some family what you pay as pride price may not be more than N10, 000.00 while in another the bride price may be as high as N15, 000.00 but he added that in recent times the situation has changed where some families do not request for bride price.

On whether the bride price is considered  in connection with the lady’ s qualification,  Terna Vanger  said that it depends on families and individuals.

According to him, ‘it used to be like that in some homes in the past because such parents would argue that it cost them a fortune to train their daughters before you see her to marry but I doubt if such still happen now’

“For instance, just few months ago, my uncle gave out his daughter who is a graduate with just N2, 000.00 as bride price.

So to Vanger, bride price is not the problem of marriage in Tivland but the expenses attached to marriage ceremony which according to him include; entertainment, cloths, and other necessary things involved in the marriage rites.

The irony part of the ceremony according to him is  that many things have  been imported into the marriage ceremony, ‘in the past there is nothing like Aso Ebi, having reception at expensive event centers and other things that make wedding ceremony expensive like what we have now.

In the case of burial ceremony, the expenses depend on individuals and families but most important thing is that the tomb is always tiles no matter the poverty of the family.

However some churches in the state, particularly, in Tivland frown at keeping the dead for long before burial.

According to Mr Tondo who worship at NKST church (Nongu U Kristu u Ser U Shar Tar ) Church of Tiv people  in Makurdi said that the church authority had mandated that dead ones be buried latest two weeks after his demise.

“This is to forestal unnecessary expenses of waiting and planning big for the burial of the loved ones.”

Tondo explained that what actually make the cost of burial a bit expensive is the casket and entertainment, ‘ but we have been advised to cut our coat according to our cloth, ‘ but the fact still remain that some people still want to go extra miles to show off that they have the money and so spend it mercilessly’.

Speaking on the timing of the tomb of the deceased, Tondo said that Tiv people believe that you decorate the resting place of the loved ones, not minding that the living live in thatched houses at the hamlet/village, the tomb is always given a face lift with tiles.

Nigerian Tribune